The Heart Decision
by PICKET-FENCES-CLOSER
Summary: Max's survival depends on her trusting her heart and finding her way back home. A final decision will shape her fate forever. Final story in the "Heart" trilogy.
1. Chapter 1

**Max & Lucas**

"Lucas," she sighed, as they broke apart on their deck. "You know I can't think when you do that."

"I've been kissing you, only you, since we were 14."

She smiled up at him with that. I drown in his eyes, that smile…how gentle and kind he is. How much he makes me laugh, think, and how proud I am to be his wife. Oh, I do love him so much. "Keep it up then."

"You get me up."

She giggled at that, as he rested his hands on her almost nine-month pregnant stomach. "And that is how Baby-Cooper-Number-Three happened."

"And how is Baby-Cooper-Number-Three?'

"Ready to come out."

Our last one, he thought, Maya when we were 17, Aiden at 24 and now this one at 28. Ten years of marriage, both up and down…damn I love her. I love the woman she became. The loving mother. My other half. The woman who takes care of me in ways I didn't know I needed. My partner. She challenges me, makes me think, laugh…that's what we wanted a home full of love and laughter. "Can you keep BCNT in there tonight?"

Oh, he makes me feel sexy, even with 25 pounds of baby weight in my stomach. Desirable. Loved. "I can try."

He kissed her again. "Come here, Maxine Cooper."

* * *

 **Kenny**

No, Max, no…what are you doing? Not with Lucas Cooper, never with him. He's going to destroy you. You need to come with me.

* * *

 **Max**

She smiled as she baked cookies with Maya. "I'm honored you want to spend time with me."

"Mom, come on."

Almost 12, she thought, so grown up. The baby no one but me and Luc wanted. My baby who likes boys now. "What, Kiddo?"

"Dad is too protective."

Max smiled at that. "That's his job."

"I saw you and Dad kissing last night. That's what he doesn't want me doing."

Max flushed at that. We were wrapped up in each other last night. How he still makes my heart race after 14 years. He doesn't want her to…to do what we did. We were lucky, the exception, we made it…yes it would have been easier if we waited, but how can I ever regret anything when I look at this kid? "You have plenty of time for that."

"Is it what you and Dad did when you were my age?"

"I didn't know him until I was 14. That's a big difference."

"But people…Mom…"

She looked at her. "We were young, but not that young. What people?"

"They said that dad ruined your life. I heard parents in the parking lot."

I hate those parents…why did we stay in Vermont? Luc's family, even moving a few towns over and…Ugh. "Never, Maya. You were a surprise, a gift, and we were young, 17, but…I wouldn't change anything."

"You're so smart mom, you could have done anything. That's what Dad said."

Max hugged her tightly with that. "I love our life, Maya. You were never a mistake or regret with me. Neither is Aiden or this baby. We want you to do whatever you want with your life."

Maya hugged her back. "Will a boy love me as much as dad loves you?"

Max smiled at that. "For sure."

"You guys kiss all the time. You never fight."

"Your dad is a good kisser."

"Mom!"

"Tell me about this boy."

* * *

 **Kenny**

He stared at the house. She's in there. She doesn't know what she's doing here. She doesn't realize. She isn't ready to know yet. She's happy here, with him. Married, kids, I hear her laughing with them. No.

* * *

 **Max & Lucas**

"I can watch this all day."

Max looked up from where she was feeding three-day old Lily. All golden skinned and red-brown curls. "She's almost done."

"You looked this way with Aiden and Maya."

"I was terrified with Maya…I thought I'd break her."

"We both were. Every time I picked her up, I thought I'd hurt her."

"She turned pretty good. Luc?" Max asked. "Back then, did you ever think we'd…it was hard. Did you think we'd end up like this?"

"I knew I'd marry you."

"I'm serious."

"So am I. Yes, I thought we'd wait on having kids, but…we didn't. I know how much you lost out on."

She shook her head, as she burped Lily. "I didn't lose out. I have you, our family, we have our home, our bar… I'm really happy."

"You could have changed the world."

"I love you. I love our family."

He took Lily from her to lay in her crib. Pressing his lips to hers. "I love you too. More and more every day. You're my better half."

She smiled up at him. My heart, she thought, my love. How I drown in his dark eyes and that smile makes me melt. "We're a team."

"Team Cooper."

"Team Cooper is solid."

He pressed his lips to hers. "I love you, Darlin. In fact, I love you so much, how about you take a shower and rest?"

She grinned at that. "That I'm taking you up on. We did good, Luc."

* * *

 **Kenny**

Lucas is gone…he left her home alone with a week-old baby and the rest. Just vanished into the town. How does she not know? This place isn't her home. Where is she going? Follow her.

* * *

 **Max**

"She's adorable."

Max looked up and froze. Him… he looks like that guy from my dream. The one that choked me. No, not him, just a similar…stop being weird. "Thanks."

Kenny just looked at her. She doesn't know me. Not here. Not this time. She's Maxine Cooper…she isn't…she isn't this person. "Do you need help?"

She shook her head, as she readjusted her sling Aiden took her hand. "Nope, we're good."

"Max, wait."

"How do you know my name?"

"Your bar. We met there," Kenny lied. "We need to talk."

She shook her head. "I need to go."

"Wait."

"Don't touch me," she snapped, pulling back from him.

"Max, focus. This isn't real. None of this is."

"Mommy?" Aiden said, tugging on her hand. "He's scaring me."

Me too, Max thought, not real? He's probably drunk or high. "We're leaving. Now."

"You need to remember. You need to wake up. Taylor and Cooper need you. You need to wake up."

* * *

 **TBC**


	2. Chapter 2

**Hospital**

"Oh, Max," Jill said, looking at her still unconscious friend. Max not waking up. Kenny missing… his drug empire in shambles. Taylor traumatized, not letting her brother out of her sight. Baby Cooper, that's what she calls him. There is a lot of Max in her. "We're all here for you."

"No change?"

Jill looked over at her husband. "There isn't a medical reason for her not to wake up."

"How could he do this? Prison, it changed him. He would never have hurt her. Even when she had the affair…I didn't think he'd do this."

"Her kids…if she doesn't wake up."

"She'll wake up."

* * *

 **Max**

She threw her arms around him, kissing him in the office. "You're here."

"Darlin?" Lucas asked, as she kissed him again. "Not that I'm not glad to see you, but what are you doing?"

"You're here and real."

"Max?" he pressed. "You want to sit? Rest? Are you okay?'

"Don't let go."

He squeezed her tightly, looking at Aiden on the couch and Lily in her seat. "I always have you."

Real, she thought, it's us. My life with him is real. Lucas. My heart. "I love you so much, Luc. I'm never leaving you."

"Good."

She inhaled his familiar scents. Real. Home. "I'm yours."

"And I'm yours. Max, are you okay?"

No, she thought, as the walls wavered around her and he felt less substantial in her arms. No…he's real. This is real. Forcing herself to believe that, she smiled at her again solid husband. "I'm with you. Of course, I am."

"I'm never letting you go."

"Let her go."

Max clung tighter to him. "He isn't real. I'm here. I'm with you. I want to be with you."

Lucas didn't let her go, as he looked at Kenny. "You're safe. You're with me."

"Max," Kenny pushed. "You don't belong here. You know this isn't real."

"Leave her alone," Lucas said. "She's home. We're together."

"I'm home."

"He isn't real, Max," Kenny continued. "You can't stay here. You don't belong here. You need to wake up. Your kids, your real kids, need you."

"She's my wife. This is our family," Lucas said. "Just leave us alone here. We belong with each other. You never deserved Max."

"We belong to each other," Max said softly. "You're my soulmate."

"Snap out of it, Max," Kenny said, as she clung to the other man. "You're going to die. Get that through your head. Wake up. Look at him. That isn't Lucas. You're not his wife. You don't belong here."

"Of course, I'm Lucas. Max is my wife."

"I'm your wife," she whispered, kissing him softly

"We love each other," Lucas continued, kissing her back.

"I love you, Lucas," she repeated. "Only you."

"We're together and you need to go," Lucas continued. "Don't ruin this like you did everything else."

* * *

 **Kenny**

Alive, how is she still alive? My loving wife in a coma…she couldn't even die properly. Her kids in protective custody. Her story played over and over…a hero and not a whore. They don't know her. No one knows her like I do.

* * *

 **Max**

What…how did we get here? We were just…how?

"Mom, come on," Maya said. "Dad cooked."

We were just at the bar…arguing with that guy. How are we home? How is it summer now and we're cooking out? I'm pregnant too, she thought, placing her hand on her stomach. How…I'm cracking up. "He did?"

"He said he had to feed Baby Cooper Number Five."

Max looked at her…she's so grown up. Five…five kids. What is happening? Lucas…smiling a me. Aiden, Lily and Jonah. Now this…My home. Where I belong.

"Looking good, Darlin."

My family, she thought, no…It's blurring and…they're fading? No… it's real. I'm real.

* * *

 **Hospital**

"Mommy?" Taylor asked, taking her hand. "Why is she still sleeping? Mommy, I need you. Baby Cooper needs you. Mommy, please wake up."

* * *

 **Max**

Not pregnant, she thought, what is this? It keeps changing…every time…my life here. "Luc?"

"How is my lovely wife?"

A different house…our cozy little one to this huge… "What's happening?"

"What?"

"This isn't weird?"

"You're being weird."

He's a doctor, I'm a lawyer…we're…damn it. No, it's all different. This isn't our house, he doesn't own a suit. My whole world is spinning. "Sorry, I think I'm coming down with something."

He pressed his lips to her forehead. "Get some rest, Darlin. I'll see you tonight."

That guy. The one who tells me I'm not real…he has to be doing this. I need to find him. The world blurring and wavering around her again. "Damn it!"

"You see what's happening?" Kenny said, as they sat across from each other. "You feel it, Max. You this isn't real. You can't hide from it. That isn't Lucas…those kids aren't yours."

"Why are you doing this? Why are you ruining my life?"

"I'm trying to save it."

"I just want to be with Luc and our kids."

"Which ones? It keeps changing on you. That isn't Lucas."

"He is Luc."

Kenny shook his head. "You're hiding, Max, you feel safe with Lucas here. You created this place in your head, and I know it hurts…you need to wake up, Max."

"I am awake."

"No. This is…you…Focus. Remember."

She stared at him. What is he doing to me? "No. I want Luc."

"Max."

"You killed him. Then you killed me."

"You're not dead yet."

"Lucas…I want him."

"He's dead. You're not. That isn't him…this is in your head. Wake up, Max, please wake up."

"I don't want to leave him."

"Max."

"Luc!" she cried, running into his waiting arms. "Luc, what's happening?"

"Why are you listening to him?"

"You died," she said softly, stroking his face. "I remember now…I watched you die."

"I'm right here, Darlin."

She kissed him. "I love you, Lucas. I should have never left you. Not for college, a job, anything. I'm so sorry…we could have been great. I wanted to marry you, have kids with you, I wanted us to spend our lives together. I loved you so much, Lucas Cooper."

"Don't leave again. I need you."

The world blurring. Kenny killed him…then he was choking me until I woke up here. With Luc, thinking it was a dream…but… I don't want to leave Lucas again. "What happened to me? You're not Kenny…"

"You're dying. You need to wake up. Your kids, Max."

"Max, don't go."

And he's not Luc, she thought, kissing him for the last time. "I'll always love you. You're my heart, Lucas. My kids, my real kids, Taylor and Cooper, need me. Cooper, I named him for you. I love you so much."

"Max?" he asked as he and the room faded away. "Max!"

She wiped her tears away. "Taylor and Cooper."

Kenny smiled. "It's time to wake up."

* * *

 **Hospital**

"Mommy, please."

 _No, Max thought, looking at her daughter curled up in the hospital next to her body. My baby…my Taylor._

 _"Are you ready?" Kenny asked._

 _"You're not Kenny."_

 _"You made your home with Lucas, your spot to heal," he said. "I needed to get you out of it."_

 _"Lucas, my Luc…is he okay? He didn't suffer?"_

 _Kenny smiled at her. "He will always watch over you. You'll see him again, Max. Just not yet. You need to live. Your children, Taylor and Cooper need you."_

 _"Taylor and Cooper," she whispered. "My babies. My world."_

 _"You love them."_

 _They're my center. My world. My heart. I can't lave them. They need me. "Let me go back to them. I don't want to die. I don't want to leave them."_

 _Kenny smiled at her. So lovely, she is going to do good things. She will save her children from this. "Close your eyes, Max. You're going to make it right for everyone this time around."_

* * *

 **Max – 6 Years Ago - Vermont**

"I should go," Max said, stepping back from their long kiss and opening her eyes. "Sarah needs me."

"Sarah went home with a waiter, Darlin."

She smiled at that, enjoying his soft touch as he stroked her cheek. "We can't, Luc."

"You're still the only one who calls me Luc."

"You've always been my Luc," she said softly, as he kissed her again. "Wait. Stop. I'm married."

"You're not acting married."

She leaned into his strong arms. "I know. Luc, I'm trying to get pregnant."

"I can help you with that."

She grinned at that, resting her forehead on his chest before smiling up at him. "You're making it really hard for me to go. You know I can't resist you."

"Come upstairs, Darlin. He'll never know. I miss you."

"I'll know," she said softly, letting him kiss her one more time. No one should be able to kiss like Lucas Cooper. "I can't. I love him, Luc."

He smiled at that, combing through her long hair. "He's a lucky guy."

She smiled back at him, as he let her go after a long hug. "I'm the lucky one."

And I'm the one who screwed up…I should have never let her go. "Good night, Max."

"Good night, Lucas."

* * *

 **TBC**


	3. Chapter 3

**Max & Kenny:**

She smiled at Kenny as he placed his hands on her eight-month-pregnant stomach. "She's moving around in there."

Not sterile, he thought, she's not infertile…we made a baby. She's glowing. "You should get off your feet."

"Stop," she sighed. "I'm fine."

Soft, pretty, so feminine and I've never seen her like this…I never thought I would. This is how I love her. Wrapped around me, the girl next door, not jumping into danger, waddling around, my wife. "You always are."

"I'm still me…just fatter."

"I know you're not enjoying this."

I've been so sick, she thought, even now. My belly…how hard it is to keep the weight on being this sick. How Jill is worried about premature labor. My baby…I should have told them about my abortion. If it did something to me and…How can I tell him now? "I feel okay. I know it's been rough. She's going to worth it."

"You're really pale, Honey."

"Kenny," she sighed, as he led her to the couch. "Stop. I'm not broken. Just pregnant."

"With our kid, Honey, and it's been hard on you. Let me take care of you."

She bit her tongue, as he all but sat her on the couch. He's being sweet and rubbing my feet. Looking at her swollen stomach. My other baby would be…16. The hardest thing I did was aborting it and Luc is the only one who knows. Luc, who I almost slept with eight months ago. Oh, it would have been…nope, not cheating on Kenny. I love Kenny, even with this.

"Max?"

Would he still love me if I told him? My Catholic husband, who told me didn't believe in divorce, abortion and only consented to birth control to be safe. Would he still look at me like this? This utter love and devotion. My deepest secret…the part of me Luc only knows.

"You with me?"

She smiled at that, leaning back against the cushions. "Pregnancy brain."

"Max?" he asked, as she passed out. "Max?"

* * *

 **Kenny**

"She has _placental abruption_ ," Jill said. "I want her on bed-rest."

He looked at his passed-out wife in the hospital bed. Blood. "She won't like that."

"She needs to or…It's a high-risk pregnancy now. She needs this."

* * *

 **Max**

"But why?" Max asked, looking at her belly. "Will she be okay?"

"We're going to monitor you. You're going to rest. Max, we're going to schedule a C-Section."

I need to know, she thought, Kenny went home to get me clothes. "Can I ask you something? As my doctor…and I…I don't want Kenny to know."

Jill looked at her young and pale friend. "Of course, you can."

"I…I had…I had an abortion when I was 16. Did that…did that cause this?"

Oh, Jill thought, seeing her look away at her soft admission. She did what? And she looks ashamed. "Max, no. Of course not."

She gulped. "Kenny can't know."

"You were a child yourself."

"We went to Canada…my parents never knew. Just me and the father and…it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. We just cried in his car and…we were too young."

"You did what?"

Max felt her world go still at Kenny's shocked and angry expression. "Hi."

"You had an abortion?"

She gulped. "I was 16."

"You killed a baby."

"It wasn't a baby."

"I can't look at you right now."

Damn it, she thought, as he tossed her stuff in the chair and left. Damn it.

"He'll come around, Max."

Not to this, she thought, never to this.

* * *

 **Max**

She looked at the days old baby in her arms and smiled despite everything. Taylor, she thought, she's perfect. Oh, I like this…and I love her so much. Inhaling the sweet scent of baby, she marveled at the ease of feeding the tiny person in her arms. Looking up she saw her husband looking at her. "Hi."

Max, he thought, with our daughter. The baby killer…is…she killed her baby. How could she? "Hi. She's almost done."

She lied to me. She's a killer…who is so loving and delighted by being a mom. She could have been one all along. "Is she?"

She looked up at her husband. "How long are you going to be mad at me for?"

"How long has your baby been dead for?"

"That is not fair. I was 16, Kenny. It's something I never told anyone before."

"Because you're ashamed and know it's wrong."

"It isn't something I'm proud of…but I'm not ashamed."

"You murdered a baby."

She burped Taylor, keeping her temper in check. "I was 16 and made the hardest decision of my life, with just my boyfriend with me. We talked about running off, getting married, keeping it…his mom got cancer and…Do you really think it was an easy choice? I loved our baby but…we were young."

"Not so young that you made and killed a baby with him."

"There you go, Tay," she smiled, burping their daughter. "My abortion has nothing to do with you and me. Stop punishing me for something I did before I even knew you."

"I don't know you anymore."

"No, you just can't stand it when I do something that isn't in your ideal vision of me."

"You killed a baby."

"I love you. I love the family that we have with Taylor. You can't keep treating me like this."

"How can I ever trust you not to hurt her after what you did? Your body tried to kill her."

"Oh, you asshole," she spat. "Taylor is a living and breathing…she's our daughter. I love her. Stop punishing me."

"You're not who I thought you were."

She looked at him. "Who am I then?"

"I don't believe in divorce."

She felt her heart run cold. "You want to divorce me over something I did a lifetime ago?"

"We're not getting a divorce, Max. You're my wife."

She stood up slowly, snuggling with Taylor. "Then treat me like it. I'm not your punching bag. I'm going to put Taylor to bed. What?"

My Max, he thought, with our daughter. "Who was the guy? You never mentioned him."

"His name is Lucas."

"You loved him?"

"I did. Very much."

"Did he force you?"

I almost slept with him nine months ago. I always slept with him when I was single…we laugh together. He gets me in a way that no one else does…I'm not that teenager anymore. "Force me?"

"The abortion."

She shook her head. "We really considered keeping it. He really wanted to keep it, we talked about running off, getting married, being a family together… but…I wouldn't have gotten through it without Luc."

"You were going to marry him?"

"I was 16, Kenny. I was fighting with my parents all the time. Running away and getting married and having a baby… Don't you remember being that age?"

"I wasn't killing babies."

He won't forgive me. Does he get how hard it was? Just me and Lucas, that old car, and how tightly he held me. How I still wonder… "I'm going to put Taylor to bed. Let me know when you get off your high horse."

* * *

 **Max & Jill **

"She is adorable."

Max cuddled a month-old Taylor after her checkup. "I think so too…but I'm biased."

Jill looked at her for a long moment. "How are you doing?"

She looked up at that. "I love being a mom…even with the late-night feedings, diapers and…I'm exhausted and…Oh, I just love her so much. I didn't know I could love someone like this."

"And Kenny?"

"He's a great dad."

How tense he was with her in the hospital, every moment after he found out about her abortion. "Is that all?"

"He can't let go of something I did a lifetime ago. That had nothing to do with him. It's like I'm revolting to him…he's sleeping in the guestroom."

"Max."

"I fell off the pedestal. He has this idea of me and… He told me he doesn't know me anymore. He won't talk to me, look at me…We just had a baby and…I don't think he wants me anymore. I think he stopped loving me."

She is glowing with Taylor, Jill thought, she has since she held her the first time. "Max, Kenny loves you."

"I'm not so sure anymore."

* * *

 **Max & Kenny**

"My parents really want to meet her."

"You hate your parents."

Max bit her lip. "Sometimes."

"I have to work."

And I want some space…I can't live like this. "Maybe a few days apart would do us some good."

"Is that what you want?"

"I want my husband to treat me like he doesn't hate me. I can't live like this."

Kenny looked at her for a long moment. Softer, hurting…I can't. I can't believe she did that. How can she love Taylor so much after killing her other baby? "I can't."

She nodded, her heart breaking in two. "I hope whoever you are with next doesn't disappoint you like I did…because what you're doing? It isn't fair."

* * *

 **Max – Vermont**

They flew me and my six-week-old baby on a private jet. My perfect Taylor, a few tears, but she was happy to feed and snuggle with me. Oh, how can I be upset when I have this perfect girl? Kenny just let us go…told me that I'd better be back soon, or he'd file kidnapping charges. I think he hates me…the man I love. My parents…they're better grandparents.

"She is lovely."

Max smiled at that. "I couldn't believe it, Mom."

"She looks like you."

Kenny's eyes, she thought, all that dark hair. I see it in the face, I'm such a softie with her. "She's a mix of us."

"How long are you staying?"

She tried not to squirm at the way her father was looking at her. "A few days. I wanted you to meet your granddaughter…Kenny has to work and."

"He won't come here," he father said. "He keeps you from your family."

"We haven't been close in a long time, Dad. It was just," Max trailed off. "Having a kid…I don't want it to end up like we did."

"Stay, Maxine, for as long as you like."

* * *

 **Kenny & Jill **

"It's none of your business."

Jill looked at the young man that she thought of as her own. "She took your daughter, your new daughter, to Vermont. Kenny, she's really upset."

"What she did…"

"What Max did was almost 18 years ago. She was very young. Her family doesn't know, just the father, until us."

"He's in Vermont."

"I think they're still friends."

"She never mentioned him either."

"If you want to fix your marriage, you need to go to her. You need to make this right."

* * *

 **Max & Lucas**

"Max?" She looked up from where she was talking with her sister and broke into a grin. "Lucas."

He grinned back at her and nodded to her baby sling. "That new?"

"Do you want to meet her?"

Gorgeous, he thought, as she handed him Taylor. "Ah, Darlin, look what you did."

She smiled at her ex and her daughter. He is sweet with her, and oh that smile. "You're good at this."

Should be us, he thought, she still makes my heart melt. Nah, she's happily married. A new mom. That kiss almost a year ago? I almost thought…until she pulled away. "You did good. She's just as pretty as you. Damn, the boys are in trouble when she grows up."

Oh, crap, she thought, seeing Sarah suppress a smile at his blatant flirting. "I'm kind of a mess right now."

Battered old jeans, sweater, pony tail… "Nah, you're always lovely to me. How long are you around for?"

"It's open ended. You know, maternity leave and…I want to spend some time with my family."

"We should get a drink."

And end up naked. No, it didn't happen last time. Last time I had a husband who didn't treat me like crap. Do not sleep with Lucas. Don't kiss him. Stop flirting. I'm drowning in his eyes. A drink. He's the only one I can talk to about this. "We should."

* * *

 **Kenny**

Max flew on a private jet, and she never takes anything from her family…and I'm in the back row, middle seat, in the middle of the night. They're probably eating a five-course meal and decking Taylor out in designer clothes. You're both coming home with me. My wife and daughter.

* * *

 **Max & Lucas**

"Look at you. Where is your kid?"

"Being spoiled by her grandparents," Max said, as she sat across from him. "They're better grandparents than parents."

He grinned at her with that. "They know you're out with me?"

She winced a bit. "No. I just said old friends. They really don't like you…and if it makes you feel better? They don't like Kenny."

"I don't like him either."

"You don't even know him."

"Talk to me, Darlin."

She smiled at the familiar nickname. Filling him in, she didn't pull away as he took her hand and laced his fingers through his. "I need this space."

"He's an asshole. It had nothing to do with him."

"He's not…He just doesn't get it. He has no idea…and I…I wasn't going to tell him."

"It doesn't give him the right…Are you leaving him?"

"I love him, Luc."

"He doesn't deserve it."

"He didn't even try to make me stay. Just that…he would file a parental kidnapping charge if I didn't come back. He doesn't…I don't know how to fix this."

He squeezed her hand with both of his. "Do you regret it? The abortion."

"We weren't ready."

"Not what I asked, Darlin."

"Yes. I know it would have been hard and…I wonder about our baby. What would have happened…My whole pregnancy I thought about it."

"We'd have a teenager…and I'm betting a house full of kids. We would have gotten married, we'd have a family…we'd be good."

"And you're emotional," he said. "And hurting…and I'm not helping."

"It does hurt."

"You need to go home…figure it out with him. One way or the other. You're a mom…we can't just…Why are you so damn pretty, Darlin? I couldn't believe you were talking to me when we were 14."

She smiled at that. "I had a huge crush. You were sweet, Luc."

"That goes against my bad boy image."

"You were gentle and kind."

"And you were this incredibly pretty, smart, fun, and…you were this rich girl who I had no business with. Your friends hated me."

"Because you were different."

"Because I'm black."

"You know that never mattered to me."

"You know it pissed your parents off."

She winced a bit at that. "They thought you were a phase."

"Max," he said, looking at their joined hands. "You need to go…before I can't let you go again."

Don't sleep with him. It would be easy to. To just let it go and…No. Don't. "I'm so messed up."

"You deserve better."

"Max? What are you doing? Where is Taylor?

* * *

 **TBC**


	4. Chapter 4

**Max, Kenny & Lucas**

She looked up at that. "Being spoiled by her grandparents. What…you're here."

"And you're holding some guys hand," Kenny said. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Why are you here?" she asked. "I thought…you made your opinion of me clear."

"So, you go out and bang some guy?'

"I'm getting a drink with an old friend."

"He's the guy who knocked you up. I found your old yearbooks. The guy who made you abort."

"He didn't make me do anything. We were 16 years old."

"Get the hell away from my wife."

Lucas looked at her for a long moment. "You okay with that, Darlin?"

She nodded. "Yeah. I'll be fine. Thanks for the talk."

"Anytime, you know that. I'll be at the bar."

Kenny watched him go. "Darlin? Why is he calling you that? He's black."

"I'm aware of that…and he's always called me that."

"No other man is calling you something like that. And you were holding his hand."

"I needed someone to talk to. That's all it was. Why do you care? You won't talk to me."

"I care that my wife is sitting here, flirting with some guy, while our daughter is home with her douchebag parents."

"They're better grandparents than parents. And I'm not flirting. He's the person I can talk to about this, it…you've been treating me like I committed some unforgivable crime. I love you, I want us to work…but Kenny? I can't live with you treating me like this. What I did when I was 16 has nothing to do with you. It was my body, my choice. If you can't live with that…we need to explore our options."

"We're not getting divorced."

"Then stop treating me like this."

He looked at her for a long time. "Come home."

What if Taylor does something like this? Will he freeze her out? Will we raise her like this? "I think we need a marriage counselor."

"Not a chance."

"Are you not serious about fixing us?"

"I want the woman I married back."

"I'm still me. You just know…you know a part of me that…it was Lucas' and my secret for a long time."

"I have a hotel. We're not staying with your parents."

"Okay. Taylor is probably sleeping and…tomorrow? Maybe spend some time as a family?"

"Not with your parents."

She nodded. "What hotel? I'll meet you."

"Are you staying here? With him?"

She looked at Lucas at the bar. He's keeping an eye on me, he looks worried. I think a few more kind words, I'd be falling in his arms and bed. "No, I was heading out soon anyway."

"Get your coat. Did you drive?"

She nodded. "Do you need a ride? You can stay with me…I know Taylor would love to see her daddy in the morning."

"I'm not staying there, and neither are you after tomorrow."

I want to stay with Lucas tonight, she thought, no…stop it. My parents and I are okay right now…maybe I can mend fences. They do hate Kenny…and I love Kenny. I do, even right now. "I'll bring her by after breakfast then."

He grabbed her hand and pulled her toward him. "Stay away from that guy, Max."

Something nagging at her, it's familiar, she thought, like déjà vu. No, fix my marriage. "Okay. Walk me to my car?"

He pulled her closer and kissed her hard on the mouth. Mine, he thought, seeing the other man watching them. She is my wife.

* * *

 **Sarah & Lucas**

"You are so in love with my sister."

Lucas looked up from where he was wiping the bar down. "I've always loved her. What's up with her marriage? I thought the guy…he was rough with her."

"Max loves him…I don't know why. Or at least she says she does…she'll stay for Taylor."

"Taylor is adorable. You don't take your six-week-old across the country without a reason."

"You know Max loves you too. She cried before she moved to Wisconsin…it was over you. She thought you were going to propose. To go with her. To ask her to stay. Go to her. Tell her before she goes back to him for good."

* * *

 **Max & Kenny**

"Did she grow in the last four days?"

Max nodded. "She's a good eater. I think she missed you."

He looked at her sitting cross legged on his hotel bed. My wife, he thought, nothing but leggings, sweater and her hair loose. Hurt, I hurt her…I can't let it go. Then she was with him… "You were talking to him about us."

She looked at him with that. "I was. He's the only one who knows about it…I needed to talk to him."

"I saw how the two of you were looking at each other."

"We never judge each other."

"You were holding his hand."

"He knows how upset I am."

"Where is he now?"

"Work? He has a life here that doesn't involve me."

He laid Taylor in the hotel crib and turned back to her. "I want you to come home."

"Why?"

"Because you're my wife. The mother of my child."

"You've been really mean to me. Judgmental over something that had nothing to do with you. Kenny, having an abortion is the hardest thing I ever did. I was 16 and…I wasn't ready. I was very lucky to have Lucas with me. He was a rock."

"You did something…something that goes against everything I believe in."

"I want our marriage to work, but it can't if you treat me like this."

He sat down next to her and didn't take his eyes off her. "You're my wife, Max."

"Kenny, I need some space. You really hurt me. You took something…you took the hardest thing I ever had to do and threw it in my face. You made me feel horrible about myself. You shoved me away, wouldn't talk to me, sleep in the same room with me. We just had a baby and…I needed you."

"Max."

"No. You do this. You push me away and treat me like crap. Kenny, I can't…I thought you loved me."

"I do love you."

She shook her head. "You wouldn't have treated me like this if you loved me."

"You never told me."

"No one knew beside me and Lucas."

"You never told me about him either."

"Lucas is…I didn't know how. We were together for four years, off and on through college and we slept together whenever we were both single and in the same place."

"Would you have slept with him yesterday?"

"I'm not single."

"I saw how you two were looking at each other."

"I needed a friend."

"A friend who wanted to take you to bed. And I know you. You would have gone to bed with him if I hadn't shown up."

"You think I'll cheat on you?"

"I saw how you looked at him."

"And you assume I'd just blow off my marriage vows? That's your conclusion?"

"You left. Came here. With him."

"I came here because of how you treated me. How you're still treating me. I had an abortion, Kenny, at 16. I don't regret it and you can't judge me for it."

"You killed your baby."

She wiped her tears and stood up with that. "I think…I don't think we should be together anymore. We need to work something out with Taylor."

"We are not getting divorced."

"Why do you even want to be married to me? Do you still love me?"

"I can learn to forgive you."

"Forgive me? I didn't do anything wrong! I don't need your forgiveness!"

"You murdered a baby!"

"You weren't there! You didn't know me then!" she cried, as he grabbed her arm and pulled her up with him. "Let go!"

"You're my wife, Max! You're not supposed to be this whore who had an abortion and wants to have an affair!"

"I'm not a whore!"

"You're mine!"

"Let go of me!"

"You make me insane!" he continued. "You are not leaving me!"

"You're hurting me!"

He tossed her on the bed again. "Undress."

She scrambled to her feet. "Taylor and I are leaving."

"You are not taking my daughter."

"She needs me more than you."

"You bitch. You're going to him."

"I'm not going to Lucas! I'm not having an affair with him!" she cried, as he pushed her back on the bed. "Stop!"

"You're not going anywhere."  
"Get off me!"

He pinned her down. "Stop fighting me."

I can't move, she thought, he's too strong. He's going to…no…he can't. He won't hurt me. Kenny could never hurt me. "Are you going to…force me? Rape me?"

"Max," he said, looking at her terrified expression. "Max."

She leaped back to her feet as he backed away from her. Grabbing her coat and purse, as he sunk down in the chair. Picking up her sleeping daughter, she backed away from him, her heart shattering as she did. Not saying anything, she fled.

* * *

 **Max & Lucas**

"Darlin?"

Max looked up from where she was watching the lake, with Taylor snug against her chest. Lucas…of course it's Luc. "Hi."

She looks wrecked, he thought, shaken. Ah, she's been crying. "What are you doing out here?"

"I wanted to be alone."

"We used to come here. It was one of the few places I could afford to take you."

She smiled at that. "Hamburgers from that school bus was our first date."

"You want to talk about it?"

She shook her head. "No."

Sighing as he wrapped his arm around her and squeezed her tightly. "It's getting cold. How about we go get a coffee or something? Warm up?"

She looked at a sleeping Taylor before back at him. My family, it's…Kenny…I want to crawl into bed and never wake up. No, I need to be here for Taylor. I need a lawyer. I shouldn't be with Luc right now… "Okay."

* * *

 **Kenny**

Max, he thought, her expression burned in his mind. Was I going to…she makes me crazy? She's…she's going to leave me.

* * *

 **Max & Lucas**

"How is the adorable baby?"

She wrapped her hands around her coffee cup. "She's the best thing in my life."

"She's lucky to have you."

"My marriage is over."

He looked at her for a long time with that. "You don't mean that."

She gulped back her tears at that. Pushing her sleeve where the places Kenny grabbed her turning purple. "I can't."

He ran his thumb over her bruises. "Are you okay? Physically?"

She nodded. "He pinned me to the bed and…I thought…he didn't… I can't."

I'll kill him, Lucas thought, no, just be there for her. She needs a friend, nothing else right now. "He won't touch you again."

"I loved him. I wanted us to be a family."

He squeezed her hand in his. "I know."

"I thought we'd be together forever."

"I know you did."

"How can I do this? We're…How do I do this? How do I walk away and…He's a good father?"

"Talk to me, Darlin."

"How do I do this to Taylor? How do I break up our home?"

"You're going to give her an amazing home."

"I don't want to do this alone."

"You're not alone."

"I meant everything I said when I married him."

"I saw pictures of your wedding. I liked the blonde hair…not as much as the blue and purple though."

"You liked me no matter what I looked like."

"My preppy princess went wild…you were always you underneath it all. You know, we might not have talked or saw each other for months, but as soon as we did? It was like no time passed. You always made me smile, Darlin, you still do."

She looked at her hand in his. "I was never a princess."

"You had a sweater set and a pleated skirt. Pearls."

She smiled despite herself. "And you still liked me."

"You were the prettiest girl I had ever seen…you still are. It hit me in the gut…and then I realized how smart, funny, independent, and…I couldn't believe you wanted to hang out with the scholarship kid."

She looked at him. "Uh the scholarship kid was cute and charming…and you let me be myself with you. Who I was underneath…the preppy princess thing. And you liked that person, flaws and all. Kenny, he…I wasn't who he wanted. Not deep down."

He looked at her. "He's really lucky that you loved him."

"He had this idea of me. He couldn't handle when I wasn't what he thought, what he needed me to be. He could forgive me when we were just friends…not as his wife. I thought that us loving each other would be enough."

"You have options. He should have never…those bruises. If you love him…"

She looked at him. "What if he treats Taylor like this?"

"You won't let him. You're going to make sure Taylor is loved and happy."

"How do you know the right thing to say?"

"We've known each other for almost 20 years. We're connected, Darlin."

"I know."

"And I'm here…for whatever you need."

"I know."

Ah, I love her, he thought, no, don't. She's vulnerable and hurt. She doesn't know what she wants. Why didn't I marry her? Why did I ever let her go? I should have been selfish and asked her to stay. To marry me…where would we be? Would we have made it work? Just be her friend right now. That's all she needs from me. Ah look at her with Taylor. I love watching her being a mom. "How about I give you and that adorable baby a ride back to your parents? Unless you…you want to hang out?"

"I should put her to bed. I'm so tired, Luc…I just want to crash and…I need to get a lawyer and…"

"One thing at a time."

"Thanks."

He squeezed her hand again. "Anytime. Come on. Let's get you home."

* * *

 **Kenny**

That slut, he thought, watching her climb out of his car. Of course, she was with him. she probably slept with him already. I'm not losing my wife and daughter. Not now. Not ever. He isn't leaving until she's inside. What a gentleman. Following him down the street, he isn't taking her away from me.

* * *

 **TBC**


	5. Chapter 5

**Kenny & Lucas**

"You don't know how lucky you are," Lucas stated, looking at him outside his apartment. "You have an amazing wife and an adorable daughter. She loves you."

Kenny glared at him. "You don't know anything."

"I know one of my oldest friends is pretty devastated over her failing marriage. That she never expected the man she married to treat her like crap. Her abortion? We were 16. She was fighting with her parents all of the time, my mom was just diagnosed with cancer, we were juniors in high school, and there was no way…she sobbed afterwards. We sat in the car all night and cried. We loved our baby and each other enough to…we talked about running away together. Raising a family. We were too young. Her abortion has nothing to do with you and you have no right to be doing this to her."

"What do you want with her now?"

To go back, he thought, to not let her leave all those years ago. No, if she can fix her marriage… "We're friends…and you really hurt my friend."

"You were touching her. Holding her hand. You looked like you were going to rip her clothes off."

"Oh, and I hugged her. Your wife? She's angry, sad, hurt…she needed…if you want to fix you marriage? You need to let this go. I'm not the problem in your marriage."

"You're in love with my wife."

I am, Lucas thought, I wanted to take her home with me and…she's married. Ah, I think she feels the same way. Or she doesn't know what she feels…she's all over the place. "How I feel doesn't matter because she loves you. And she is going to leave you."

"Stay the hell away from her."

* * *

 **Max**

"Hey, Kiddo," she said, sitting cross-legged on the bed with Taylor. Divorce. A broken home. Gulping back the tears pricking in her eyes, I thought we…where will I go? We can't work together if…our house. Taylor. "Oh, you are the best thing I've ever done."

I could run, it's not like I don't have the money. Start a new life and…stop it. I can get divorced. Co-parent with Kenny. Move on with my life. I'm okay. My parents at brunch, Sarah with her family…just me and Tay. Jumping a bit at the door, she snuggled Taylor close to her, as she made her way downstairs. I'll do anything for her. Freezing at the peephole, she rested her head against the door for a long moment. I can't…the bruises. Taylor. "Kenny, I want you to leave."

"Max, please."

She squeezed a squirmy Taylor tight. "You bruised me. I don't want to see you right now."

"I want to see our daughter. I want to talk to you."

"She's sleeping," Max lied, willing Taylor not to cry or make a peep. "What else is there for us to say?"

"I love you. I need you. Please, we need to talk. We can't throw us away."

Damn it, she thought, damn it. No. Not alone. My body hurts from him throwing me around. "I'll meet you in a public place."

"With Taylor?"

She pressed her lips to her daughter's head. "Yes."

* * *

 **Lucas**

Ah, look at us, he thought, flipping through those old photos. My preppy princess in some lacy dress at the freshman dance with me…I did like the blue and purple hair later on. Her rebelling, finding herself, us growing up together. We were so young. Why did I push her to go? I can't stay away from her now…or ever.

* * *

 **Max & Kenny**

Kenny looked at his daughter in his arms before back at a wary Max. She's afraid of me. It's why she brought Sarah. At least it wasn't him. She isn't with Lucas…but she wants to be. And he wants her…it's how he talked about her. It's how Max is with him without saying a word. Even if she's not sleeping with him…she likes him.

"You two made a pretty baby," Sarah said looking at her tense sister. "Seriously, my niece is sweet."

"She's pretty great," Max said evenly. He won't hurt me. He won't ever touch me again. "Oh, I think she…She is a poop monster."

"This angel?" Sarah said. "I'll change her. Order me an omelet?"

Max bit her lip as she watched her sister take her daughter. Public place. I'm safe here. "Sure."

"We did make a good baby."

"We did."

"Come home, Max."

"Not with you. Not ever again."

"I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm sorry."

"Until next time I'm not who you want? When you toss me around, call me a whore, pin me to a bed so I can't move. I'm not going home with you."

"Taylor is."

She looked at him with that. "I talked to a lawyer. They took pictures of the bruises. Taylor needs me…you'll never treat her like you treat me."

"You're not taking my daughter away."

"You need therapy. I don't feel safe with you or having our daughter alone with you."

"Stop making excuses so you can be with him."

"He's my friend. My ex. Nothing more."

"You are full of crap."

"You're jealous of the guy I dated in high school."

"The guy you never mentioned. The person you ran to the minute things got hard with us."

She looked at him with that. "You made how you feel about me perfectly clear. I can't live with these expectations, Kenny. When I'm not who you want…when I'm not who you expect me to be. I'm not this…I have a past. Why is this so hard for you? I was 16. Scared. I wasn't ready. I never told anyone before and…I thought you loved me…but…only if I'm who you want me to be."

"I love you, Max."

"This isn't love. No one should be treated how you've been treating me."

"Max," he pressed, reaching out and grabbing her hand as she stiffened at the contact. "You…you never told me. You did this…it was a big thing and…"

She heard the change in his voice. "It was a big thing. A hard thing."

"Why didn't you tell me? You can tell me anything. We were trying to have a baby, struggling and…you knew you could. You were sick, and…you still hid it from me."

She bit her lip and looked at him for a long moment. "I didn't know how. I never told anyone."

"Why not?"

"We were 16. It was our secret and by the time we got older? Why would we? I grieved for that child. I have wondered about if it was a boy or girl. If Luc and I kept it. I look at Taylor and…I was ready to be a mom. I wasn't at 16. I could have told you, I know that, I just… I didn't want you to know, to have you look at me this way."

"Max."

She gulped back her tears. "It was the hardest thing I ever did before…before this."

"This?"

"Leaving you."

"Stay. We can start again. You, me and Taylor."

She gulped. "Why do you even want me?"

"You're the love of my life, Max."

"You can't even look at me. You hurt me emotionally and physically."

"And you didn't trust me enough, ever, to tell me something that shaped you, was a huge deal to you."

"What if I did tell you? Years ago? When we were just friends?"

He looked at her, so beautiful, so sad, he thought, my wife. She wasn't alone in it. She had him… Lucas who she never mentioned. Lucas who she loved. I see how he looks at her, and how she held his hand. How easily they talked, his arm around her… My Max. "You and Lucas?"

"I loved him. I wanted to marry him."

"Why didn't you?"

"We grew up. Apart."

"That isn't how he looks at you."

Max gulped at that. "You aren't the only man I ever loved."

"You're the only woman I have ever been in love with."

She looked at him with that. "Kenny."

"I mean it. I didn't now what love was until you."

"And we hurt each other so much."

"Come home, Max."

She gulped at that. I don't know what to do.

"Why is he here?"

"What?" she asked, seeing Lucas walk in. "It's a diner."

And he is still looking at her like…a casual wave and that smile on her face. My wife. She likes this guy. And Sarah, holding Taylor, talking to him. Taylor smiling at him…my family. I'm losing them to him. No. "Sarah seems to like him."

"She's my sister. The perfect daughter…she did everything right, while I…we were jealous of each other. Me that she had my parents love and support and her that I didn't seem to care and did what I wanted."

"Of course, you cared."

"Yeah. It hurt…but I had someone who loved me too. Someone I could talk to."

Kenny stared at her. "You still love him."

"No."

"You paused."

"I did not."

"Be honest."

She looked at her husband with that. "I love you. I married you. I had a child with you. I should have told you. If you wanted to marry a saint? I was the wrong choice."

"No. You're the love of my life. Without you and Taylor I'm nothing."

"Damn it, Kenny."

"I love you. Come home," he said, hating Sarah and Lucas with Taylor. No, I can't be jealous… That expression on her face when she looks at him. We need to go home. "Please. We deserve another chance. I want to make it right."

She looked at her hand in his. Ignore Lucas, and this incredible pull I have to him. What do I want? I can't throw away my marriage…I need to try. I made a choice to marry him. To be his wife. I need to see it through. "Let's try again."

* * *

 **Sarah & Lucas**

"Adorable baby," Lucas said, looking over at Max. "How is that going?"

"I don't know. She really hasn't said. You saw the bruises where he grabbed her? Why aren't you two together? Seriously, Max loves you. Don't you love her?"

Ah, I do. She makes me smile, laugh, and I want to gather her up in my arms and never let her go again. "She's a married lady with an adorable baby."

"That wasn't the question."

"I've loved your sister for 20 years. We had our chance."

"Does she look happy?"

Tense and stubborn, he thought, she's caving to him. She wants a family, she always did. Ah, Darlin. "If she wants to save her marriage, we have to let her. She has a life back in Wisconsin that we don't know anything about."

"It doesn't change how she feels about you."

* * *

 **Max & Kenny **

"How about we spend today together? With Taylor?" Max said finally. "See how it goes."

"I'd like that. What are you doing?" he asked, as she slid out the booth. "Really?"

"What?" she asked. "I was getting the check and our daughter."

"You want to try again and the first thing you do is go to him?"

She stared at him for a long moment with that. "You're unbelievable."

"And you're full of crap."

I can't, she thought, I can't do this. And he's right…Right to Luc. Moth to a flame. She sat back down. "I just wanted to get Taylor, so we could go. You have to trust me, Kenny."

"I trust you. Not him."

She let out a long breath. Why am I drawn to Lucas? There is just this ease, connection, he gets me, I feel it right now. "Okay."

He took her hand and squeezed. "I love you, Max. I love that you're my wife."

She looked at him with that. I can do this. "I love you too. Why don't we get our daughter and go to the park? There is a lot I'd like to show you here before we go home."

"I'd like that."

* * *

 **Max & Sarah**

"Stop," she sighed, as she finished packing. "He's my husband. We had a nice day together."

"Do you not see the same bruises I do? You're a police officer. What would you tell another woman?"

"Kenny doesn't abuse me."

"Bruises. You said he called you a whore."

"I know you are pretty pro-Lucas Cooper."

"You're couple name could be Lux. I like it better than Mucas."

Max groaned at that. "Is this middle school?"

"No because the Max I knew and looked up to wouldn't put up with anyone treating her like Kenny treats you."

"You know I had a lot of trouble getting pregnant?" she said quietly. "I had a rough pregnancy, Sarah. I was talking to my doctor, after I was put on bed rest and…he overheard and was really upset."

"About you having a bad pregnancy?"

"No. That I had an abortion at 16."

"What?"

"I was pregnant, and Luc and I went to Canada. We talked about keeping it, running off, getting married…we just."

"You were too young."

"Yeah."

"Max, you could have told me."

"I know. You're my baby sister. It was private and…Kenny reacted really badly. He wouldn't talk to me, touch me, he was sleeping in the guestroom. He's very Catholic and hurt that I didn't…I could have told him, but…I hurt him too."

"What do you want to do?"

She let out a long breath and looked at her sister. "I've known all along."

* * *

 **TBC**


	6. Chapter 6

**Max & Kenny: 6 Months Later**

It's okay. We're okay. Back on an even keel. Back to work. Raising our daughter together. A weekly date. Regular sex. We're good. Smiling as she and Taylor played on the rug after Mommy & Me class. We're giving her a happy home

"Here."

She looked up as he handed her a beer. "I think I'm going to pass."

"You're done breastfeeding."

"I know."

"You look good."

My pre-pregnancy body, she thought, growing my hair out for him. Being the perfect wife, mother, cop, the clean-cut, girl next door, his dream wife. I go to work, take Taylor to classes, cook, keep the house clean, make him happy… Talking about another baby. "Running after Taylor keeps me in shape."

This is how it should be. Her, so soft, pretty, her trying in our marriage. Her being my wife again. "How about we put her to bed?"

"If we do that now, she'll be up at three."

Kenny scooped up a squirmy Taylor. "I want to spend time with you."

She smiled at him. I can't breathe. I'm not this person. I love being a mom. Having a family… It's still there, I feel his judgment. Like he sees through me. "Then you'll be getting up with her."

He looked at her. "You know she only wants Mommy that early."

And I love snuggling with her. "Later? You and me, after her real bedtime?"

"I love you, Max."

* * *

 **Lucas & Sarah**

"She says she is."

Lucas looked at her. "Do you believe her?"

"My sister who takes one out of ten of my calls?"

"She has a life there."

"What kind of life? She loves you and you love her. She wouldn't be with him if she didn't have Taylor."

"Come on, she wouldn't have married him if she didn't love him. She could have walked away, but she chose to go with him. Leave it alone."

* * *

 **Max & Jill**

"But…I just had a baby," Max stated. "How…I know how. Oh."

After a rough pregnancy, Jill thought, and she does look so happy with Taylor. "It's a surprise?"

Maybe it will bring us closer. Growing our family…that's what we are. "I mean, Taylor is eight-months-old, we were going to wait awhile longer and…I love being a mom."

"How does she like daycare?"

"She's doing good…it kills me leave her there though."

She is a good mom, she lights up with Taylor. "How are you and Kenny? I saw you two out the other night together."

"Weekly date night. We're…we're good."

"You know you can talk to me."

I don't take Sarah's calls or respond to Luc's funny texts. I can't lie to them. I can't fake being happy…they would hate this me. I'm not even sure I like her. "I know."

"Max, are you happy?"

"Why wouldn't I be? So, I'm having a baby. Kenny is going to be thrilled. I guess I'll go see my OB. Thanks."

Jill watched her bolt. Oh, Max, what is wrong?

* * *

 **Max & Kenny**

Max paused as she watched Kenny playing with Taylor in the living room. He is a good father. He loves Tay and…that can be enough. We can raise her and this new baby in a happy home. Hopefully an easier pregnancy this time for me. "Hi."

He looked up at her, as she shrugged her coat off and his heart caught in his throat. Tight jeans, purple sweater, her hair so long and shiny, looking every bit like the woman he adored. My Max, he thought, as Taylor squealed in delight at the sight of her. She is the best mom, I'll give her that. "Hi yourself."

She smiled at them, as she settled on the floor with them. "And what are you two up to?"

Kenny watched as Taylor crawled to mom and settled in her lap. Max hugging her tightly and kissing her cheek. "Max?"

She looked back at him. A family for Taylor, that's what this is. A little brother or sister in me. I can do this. No marriage is perfect. "Kenny?"

I feel the wall around her heart, even if she says and does the right things. And I love her so much still. She used to smile at me like that, that one right there, like she does with Taylor. "You want to order in tonight? Eat on the porch and stuff?"

"Sure."

"You okay?"

She squeezed Taylor tighter. I was elated to be pregnant the first time. To be a mom…this is different. Taylor was made out of love…this baby? Perfectly solid sex. "I'm great…Uh, Kenny…I'm pregnant."

He stared at her with that. "You're what?"

"Pregnant…we're making Taylor a big sister."

He reached out, brushed her hair away, drinking her in. So beautiful, he thought, so what I always wanted. We're fine. "Ah, Max…I love you so much."

"Jill said I'm six-weeks. I wasn't expecting this, but…we wanted a big family."

"You're a wonderful mother, Max."

"I'm excited."

He pressed his lips to hers, enjoying her taste and smells. She still kisses like she means it. I still feels like it did the first time. We were so young…I never wanted to let her go then or now. My Max. "Me too. Come here."

She kissed him back, his gentle touch making her cave a bit at her internal reluctance. I'm okay here. Me and our kids will be fine.

* * *

 **Lucas**

Pregnant, ah Max, what are you doing? Nope, she made her choice, I need to leave her alone. She wants to make her marriage work. She wants a family. Looking over at his date, he smiled at her. "I'm glad we could do this."

"I remember you from high school."

I hated that school, except for Max and cross country. "A long time ago."

Pamela smiled at that. "I always had a thing for bad boys."

* * *

 **Max**

"I can't come see my big sister?" Sarah asked. "Who is really bad at returning a phone call."

Max winced a bit, seeing Kenny's angry look at her dismissive attitude toward him. "I know. It's been a lot and…of course I'm glad you're here. If I had known, I would have taken some days off."

"Well, I can hang out with my adorable niece."

"She's in daycare. We already paid for it," Kenny interjected.

Sarah ignored him and focused on her sister. "You don't work 24 hours a day."

Oh, Kenny is going to give me an earful. He hates my family, and Sarah was pretty blunt with him last time. "I suppose not."

"We have things, Max," Kenny said. "Obligations."

"I know…but I can miss a few Mommy and Me classes to hang out with my sister. And I actually like her taking care of Tay better than daycare for a few days."

"We need to get her used to childcare."

"Come on," Sarah said, looking at her sister and ignoring him. "We should go get a drink. Non-alcoholic for you. Don't look like, Max, you're not 80. I'm sure Kenny can take care of Taylor for a few hours. Go change out of your sweats and put on something cute."

I hate her, Kenny thought, and Max actually listens to her baby sister. I hate her entire family. "You know Taylor has trouble going to bed unless it's you."

Keep me home and with him. Him watching me. Taylor keeping me sane here. "We won't be late…and she loves her Daddy too."

"You're pregnant."

"I know. I've been vomiting. Just a couple of hours."

She isn't leaving me. She isn't. "Have fun."

* * *

 **Max & Sarah**

I wish it was booze, Max thought. "You really don't like him."

"I want to like him because Mom and Dad don't like him… they hated Lucas too, but he was so polite it was great to watch."

"Still Team Lux?"

"See, it stuck."

"It's not going to happen."

"But you la-uv each other."

"Can we talk about anything else?"

"Fine. Has he hit you?"

"No."

"Do you smile? Ever? You're too skinny to be four-months pregnant. Are you taking care of yourself?"

"Who is the older sister here?"

"The one who is too stubborn to admit she's miserable."

"I am not."

"And if I told you Lucas was at a hotel here, what would you do?" Sarah asked, watching her sister's eyes light up at that. "See?"

"No marriage is perfect. Luc and I don't know each other, not like that, anymore."

"It doesn't matter."

I can't just leave…we have kids. A life we built…a husband who will never unconditionally love me again. Damn it. I cry in the shower. I've never felt more alone than I do in marriage. "I have a life here. I do love Kenny."

"Lucas keeps saying you wouldn't have married him if you didn't."

"And why are you talking to Lucas?"

"Jealous? He's dating."

Yes, she thought, and I suck. I'm married. I chose to come home with Kenny. Not Luc. "He's allowed. He's single."

"He loves you."

"No. Like Kenny he loves the idea of me. He doesn't know adult me."

"You two run to each other every time. I saw how you looked at each other. He adores Taylor."

"She's Kenny's daughter."

"Just saying he looked awfully comfortable with her. And you."

His gentle touch, it is how he looks at me…what am I doing? "I'm committed to my marriage."

"Even if you're miserable."

"We should go. Tay doesn't like to go to bed unless I'm there."

* * *

 **Kenny & Max**

She loves you, he thought, but her sister is putting ideas in her head. I hate her entire family. We're fine here, us, Taylor, that baby in her… she's the woman I love. Look at her with Taylor. "Max?"

Smile. Soft. Pretty. He won't hurt me. I've never been afraid of him. Until now. She looked up at him, after she finished dressing Taylor. "Kenny?"

She lights up with Taylor. She has a pregnancy glow. And she looks very wary of me. Sarah did this. No. We're fine. "How about you and me go out tonight? Take advantage of Sarah baby-sitting?"

"Just us?"

"What is wrong with you?"

"Nothing is wrong with me."

"You're not…This isn't you."

"Oh? What do you want me to be like, Kenny?"

"I want you to be my wife again, Max."

"I am your wife."

"No. You're cold and distant. You said we were okay."

"I want to be. You hurt me, and I don't want you to again. Physically and emotionally."

"You think I'm going to hurt you?"

"I had bruises, Kenny. You wouldn't get off me. I really thought you were going to…force yourself on me."

"I would never rape you."

I am afraid, she thought, that he's going to hurt me. That if I'm not…stop it. No, we were better off as friends and not this. It's not even about Lucas. "What if I have other secrets? What if I disappoint you?"

"You want to be with him."

"I do not. This is about us."

"Is he here too? Is that why Sarah is dragging you out?"

"If I wanted to sleep with Lucas, I'd sleep with Lucas. He's not here. He's in Vermont."

"You are a liar, Max. Where are you going? Don't you walk away from me."

"Let go!" she cried, as he grabbed her wrist and tossed her on the couch. Scrambling up, she backed away from him slowly. "Don't ever touch me again."

"Max, don't."

"I want you to leave. I want a divorce."

"We are not doing that."

"You're not the man I married."

"And you're just a baby murdering whore."

She glared at him with that. Taylor is safe…so is this baby inside me. "No, I was a teenager who made a hard decision. I'm not a whore. Get out."

"Only if Taylor comes with me."

"Never. You'll never treat her like this."

"You're not taking my daughter away."

"I should have never come back here with you."

"Him. It's about him."

"No, it's about me. And how I deserve to be treated. How our daughter is never doing to know this hurt. Stop!"

"You are not leaving me!"

"Kenny, no!" she cried, as he threw her against the wall. "Stop!"

"You're my wife!"

She gasped, as her world blurred as her head slammed against the wall. No…no. Not again.

* * *

 **Shadow World**

 _"You can't just make it work."_

 _Max stared at him. "It wasn't real?"_

 _"Kenny cursed you as he choked you…I enjoy playing with you."_

 _"What?"_

 _"You'll never be happy. You're never going home. He'll kill you over and over again…no matter what you choose. Reset number three._

* * *

 **TBC...Final Chapter Up Soon**


	7. Chapter 7

**Max – The Shadow World**

 **"** _Please, no more," Max begged staring at him. I only feel it when I wake up here, the dying…Taylor and Cooper are all alone. My Taylor and Cooper. They need me. So many…42 resets. Kenny killing me over and over. Killing Taylor, Luc, Sarah, anyone and everyone I care about. I can't. "Please stop. Kenny wouldn't want this. Not the Kenny I married."_

 _"You made him."_

 _"Please, my kids need me."_

 _"Yes, Taylor is quite sad. Reset 44."_

* * *

 **Max & Lucas**

"You look very…I love a man in uniform."

Lucas smiled, looking at his wife. "And I love you."

My Luc, she thought, a deputy in small town Wisconsin. A perfect place to raise Maya. "Well, Deputy, you better get a move on."

It's be 12 years, he mused, since I met her in the hallway of that snotty school. Sturggled to make ends meat, go to school, raise Maya…she's so smart. My Max…who is excited to have a job as an ER nurse. To us talking about having another baby. "You too."

She kissed him for a long moment, feeling the same tingle and excitement with him she always did. "I'll see you tonight."

"Mom, Dad, really?"

Luc kept her close, as they looked at their 10-year-old. "We are bad examples, Darlin."

"None of my friends parents ever do this. They're…old."

She did get a lot of crap about her teen parents, Max thought, especially because I'm white and Luc is black. That she's such a pretty solid mix of us…all caramel skin, those dark curls…my face. "How about I drop you off for your first day? No more kissing your dad."

Maya giggled at that. "You always kiss Dad."

"I can't help it."

"You never could, Darlin."

"And with that," she smiled. "Work and school?"

* * *

 **Kenny** **& Lucas**

I don't like him, he thought, looking at his new partner. He's too cocky and…this guy has a 10-year-old? His wife is hot in the picture on his desk. The kid looks just like her…just a different color. His wife…she looks so familiar. "You two aren't from here?"

"Vermont originally," Lucas offered. "We ended up in Maine, finished school, and…then here."

"What does your wife do?"

"Max? She's a nurse."

Max, he thought, I like that.

* * *

 **Max & Lucas**

"Team Cooper."

Max smiled at that, as he took her hand in his. It has been for 12 years…I knew I'd be his wife. Who falls in love at 14? Me. "I look okay?"

"You look lovely," he teased. "Gorgeous, sexy, it really isn't fair that you can look this good."

Max smiled at that. "You are so biased."

"Nah. I see how guys look at you. I worry when Maya gets older because she looks just like you and I'm going to be beating boys off with a stick."

Max pressed his lips to his. "She's a smart kid who will make good choices."

"You must be Max."

She looked up, as she intertwined her fingers with Lucas'. "Uh, yeah. Hi."

He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "This is Kenny, Darlin. He's my new partner. And Kenny, this is my wife, Max."

Damn, he thought, damn. Look at her. She's perfect. Obviously easy, with her having a 10-year-old. She shouldn't be with this guy. She's too pretty. "It's very nice to meet you, Max."

She nodded, her heart racing in her chest. Danger, she thought, this is wrong. The way this guy is looking at me. Hungry and…forget it. "You too."

Lucas looked at his wife who moved a step closer to him. Ah, Darlin, he is undressing her with his eyes, and she hates it. She does look good in jeans and this tight sweater. She smells good too. Not a chance, buddy, this here is my soulmate. "How about a drink?"

"We should. We've been home every night since we moved here."

"Painting and unpacking. And Maya is at her sleepover."

Kenny watched as he wrapped his arm around her. Claiming her. Her melting in to him. She doesn't feel it? She's looking at me like…she's mine. She knows it. "Welcome, Max."

* * *

 **Max & Kenny**

"Kenny," she said, her heart racing again. "Hi."

Without him, he thought, or her daughter. Looking delicious in a sundress and ponytail. "What are you up to?"

Run, she thought, he's going to hurt me. Why? He's Luc's partner. He just looks at me… "Just errands and…stuff."

"I was going to get a beer. Want to come?"

"Oh, I…I can't. I'm meeting Luc and Maya when I finish up. We've both been working a lot and…the three of us need to hang out."

"We should hang out."

Luc's partner, she thought again, that's all this is. He's being nice to his wife. "I'll run it by Luc."

"Not with him. Just you and me."

She stepped back. "I'll see you around."

* * *

 **Lucas & Max **

"Yeah?" he teased, resting his hands on her stomach. "You sure?"

She nodded, as he kissed her. "I'm really sure."

"You okay?"

She broke into a grin. "We're having a baby, Lucas."

He grinned back her, ah she makes me so happy. "You're glowing, Darlin."

"Oh, stop."

"Never."

She wrapped herself around him, kissing him. "You're the best dad…and husband. I'm so lucky. I love you so very much."

"Ah, I love you too. I can't wait to grow our family together."

* * *

 **3 Months Later**

"Luc!" Max sobbed, crawling on the floor to her bleeding out husband. "What did you do? Luc!"

Kenny pointed the gun at her. "Get up."

She cradled her dead husband, her heart shattering into a million pieces. "No…"

"Max. Now."

Maya, my baby…Luc. "Get out!"

He yanked her to her feet, looking at her swelling stomach. "It's you and me now. Like it should be."

"No."

"Lucas and Maya won't bother us and I can take care of that for you too. Don't fight me, Max."

My family…No…

"We are going to be so happy."

She grabbed the gun and shoved him with it. "I'll kill you!"

"Don't you fight me!"

"No!" she screamed again, shoving the gun at him and firing.

* * *

 **Max – Shadow World**

 _"You killed him. Very nice, Maxine."_

 _"No," she groaned. "I can't. Not again."_

 _"You are a fun toy that Kenny gave me."_

 _"Leave her alone."_

 _"Lucas," she breathed, feeling his love and warmth just like she did in life. My Luc. "Oh."_

 _"She isn't yours. She's my soulmate. Max, I love you, but you need to go and go now. Taylor and Cooper need you. Go."_

 _"Luc, I…"_

 _He grinned at her, pinning the shadows back. "I'm always with you…this just took longer than I thought. Ghosts are assholes. I love you, so much, Darlin."_

 _"I love you too."_

 _"Then go raise your kids. We'll see each other again."_

* * *

 **Max – The Hospital**

"Mommy?"

She cracked her eyes open and stared at Taylor. My baby…Taylor. "Tay…"

"Mommy!" she cried, hugging her tightly. "Mommy!"

This is real, she thought, this is real. Taylor… "I'm here."

"Me and Baby Cooper need you."

"I'm never leaving you two again," she murmured. I remember…I remember it all. Dying. Luc saved me. With me. Always. My Luc. My Taylor and Cooper. Kenny…cursed me. He's going to come for us.

* * *

 **Max – A Month Later**

"It's the only way," she said softly, cuddling Cooper to her. "He won't stop. He wants to kill me…I won't let him hurt my kids."

Jill looked at her old friend, still too thin and tired looking. "The hospital pronounced you dead. Taylor and Cooper in protective custody."

"He won't remember. Tay will."

"They have you."

They almost didn't. I remember dying. Over and over. I feel Luc with me. "I made a mess of everything. I broke him with my affair…it got Lucas killed. My daughter is traumatized. It still didn't give him the right…"

"Mommy," Taylor said, climbing onto the hotel bed next to her and hugging her. "Don't go away again."

She shifted Cooper and hugged her tightly. "Never, Tay. I love you and Cooper so much."

"The bad man, Mommy, he's going to get us. He hurt you."

"Oh, Kiddo," she sighed, as Taylor sobbed against her. "No one is hurting us. We're safe."

"He's going to get me."

Not if I get him first, Max thought, I have so much money and…he can't hide. No, I have to protect my kids. I'm not a monster. Protective custody. Witness protection. It's not just him, his drug empire…it's not forever. "We're going to have an adventure, Tay."

* * *

 **Kenny**

"Who are you?" Kenny demanded, waking up to the gun to his head. "Max?"

He chuckled. "She is very lovely, but no. Her parents have long memories and didn't like their daughter being murdered. Say good-bye."

Kenny closed his eyes, cursing her name one last time, as his world went dark.

 _"Hello, Kenny."_

 _"Who are you?" Kenny said. "Am I dead?"_

 _He smiled. "You said you cursed your wife, that you'd give up your soul to punish her. I had fun punishing Maxine, but now it's your turn."_

 _"What?"_

 _"Welcome to your hell."_

* * *

 **Max – One Year Later**

"They are lovely children, Max."

She looked at her parents, still a bit wary at their fledgling relationship. Me, back in Vermont, after Kenny's corpse and his partners was found…killed by rivals. Safe here, I can raise my kids here, have a relationship with my family again. "They are."

"You have a home here."

"I know. I want them to have their own space and…to feel normal again."

"Kenny isn't coming back."

"I know," she trailed off. "I loved him, Mom. I know I cheated on him, and it…I want my kids to be okay."

"They will. We'll make sure of it."

* * *

 **The End**


End file.
